Claustrophobia

Trapped, confined, small, and hard to breathe are feelings I experience when forced to exist in tight spaces.  Claustrophobia is a constant challenge by my mental well beings when my physical surroundings close in on me.  Expanding to life experiences, in a metaphoric comparison, claustrophobia is experienced when considering the fact that there is always something that will keep you confined or trapped in your current state of being.  Life forces in to boxes that form the boundary of our existence and lead to the same feelings when our physical space becomes confining.  Using a simple box to demonstrate the trapped feeling of a claustrophobic person it takes sheer determination to not struggle to be free while battling the impending confinement.  As our mental will weakens and the body moves to try to find space and air the box also moves and retains its form and our boundary that is within the box remains unchanged.  At the core of this work the viewer must understand the struggle and turmoil that is taking place within the box.  In order to simulate this environment of being inside a box, I have placed myself in a white room and created an imaginary box on the floor to show the struggles that happen when feeling trapped and confined.  


Video:

http://vimeo.com/38826682

Claustrophobia part 2

Claustrophobia was a multi-step project, one in which the process was important to achieving the final piece.  It first started with testing out boxes that were pre made of wood in the gallery. From there I discovered that wood was too heavy and did not allow air in for me to breath.  Then I decided that cardboard would probably be the best material, lighter and allowed some air flow. Once I had the material chosen I went to a storage unit to find the right sized box. With the help of the storage gentlemen I came to the decision that I needed a medium sized wardrobe box. From there I headed to the Alexis Gallery to set the stage for my performance. A white room where I could control my surroundings. I decided that the white needed to be connecting factor from me to my surroundings. Therefor I dressed in all white.  The 1^st performance was where I sat in the box. In hopes that I would last 30+ minutes, leaving it open ended seemed suitable seeing as I would have no clock to tell me the time.  The second performance was one in which I explored the possible feelings in which one that suffers from claustrophobia would have sitting in the same spot in an all-white room. The second part was also to show the viewer what happens, seeing as when I was in the box all you could see was the movement of the box. Both performances were done on separate days so that my mind had time to rest from one performance to the next. It was important that the mind be cleared so that each was done with a new outlook on the performance instead of thinking of the one before it. My hopes in preforming a piece about claustrophobia was in hope that the viewer would feel the anxiety and fear that one feels when dealing with claustrophobia; trapped, scared, and alone.

Observations during these performances; sitting inside of something that does not bend to your body or forces you to sit a certain way is extremely hard and makes the effects come alive faster and harder to deal with. I also believe that this is a performance that would have different outcomes the more times I do it and greatly different depending on your surroundings. If I revisit this piece I plan on doing just the box with a camera on the inside and allowing people to crowd around and listen and watch as I sit in a box.